Here I am….just another day in paradise.  LOL.  For some reason, I’ve thought a little more about Heidi Diaz today.  She’s not posting much at KK.  Is she working on her next scam.  (I’m thinking that she is).  This scam has about run its course as far as income I’d say.  I can’t imagine that many are “joining”.  It doesn’t take too much of an investigator to see the fraud for who she is.  I mean….anyone with any internet savvy at all, likely googles KK and sees a lot of what has been written.  So…I’d say that she isn’t there much at all.  My best guess is that She didn’t log on 7/18 and 7/19.  My next best guess is that she logged on 7/17 and 7/20 and had a total of about 3 posts.  Man….things sure are slow at the KIMPOUND. 

Now…she’s on my mind more…because I wanna know how her mind works.  How do the gears turn in there.   There’s something intriguing about it.  She seems to still be getting “free” advertisements or “weeds” posted about the internet about KK, but surely if there were someone to “court” at the KIMPOUND, then she would be posting there more.  Or…perhaps she is posting as a “fakie”.  Not sure….not sure it matters, because either way…its an indication that the KIMPOUND and the KIMPIRE is dying.  Not exactly the crash and burn that I may have commented on at one point….but more a slow dramatic soap opera-ey type death.  This would be typical for Heidi Diaz’s socio-pathic personality.   I hear the breathing slowing down.  the keystrokes become exaggerated, slow, deliberate and lingering.  Then they slow to one pecked letter at a time and finally…..the finally keystroke and the site is dead.  LMAO.   Yep…a dramatic Romeo and Juliet type ending.  The curtain goes down, the lights go out and silence fills the space.    Now…this is normally the place where I would say….no shame, no blame, no guilt….may it R.I.P., but in all reality, this KK thing will never R.I.P.   This scam may be just as big in the “scam” industry as Mary Kay Ash was in the home based sales/cosmetics industry.  That means a LIFETIME movie.  From what I’ve seen….it sure has the drama for a LIFETIME movie.  And, there are other facets of this that I haven’t even seen talked about yet.  They may have been addressed, but I haven’t seen it.  For example, does the Russian Mail Order Bride have a case against Heidi Diaz for using her likeness without permission.  That’s a valid civil suit.  What about the company that promotes the Russian models…have they been notified, that someone was using their models likeness.  Seems to me that that could be more legal problems for Heidi.  I chuckle to think about it.  You can’t use someone’s image without there permission, especially for the purpose of profit.  Just curious.  Makes me smile to think about it…because for all the smarts that Heidi has in mentally manipulating people……she is very very ignorant to all the laws that she has broken.  She may get an education on that before its all over.

The funny thing to me too…..I would imagine that Heidi has now labeled me a “hater”.  I’m not sure that I’m a hater.  I’m intrigued.  I’m now independent.  Do I hate Heidi Diaz…..no not really.  I’m indifferent to her.  I hope she gets what’s coming to her….but I don’t hate her. 

Oh well….it’s slow in the KIMPOUND, the news is slow outside the KIMPOUND….so I’m doing what I do best…pondering and reflecting.  Now off to bed….I will probably have dreams of Heidi and Delaney drinking poison like Romeo & Juliet on a quieted stage before a gasping audience (of 1 sock puppet).  The backhands to their foreheads and a soft collapse to the ground…the lights will dim and the curtain will fall.  Then the room will be filled with the sound of quacking ducks…(I mean appplause—HEY IT’S MY DREAM).  LOL.

Today has been a good day.  A better day.  A more controlled day. 

I have been able to think through some things.  Some things that really were eye-opening to me.  It’s funny, when the panic of being off plan is put on the back burner, (by being onplan), then you have more time to really think through the things that are bothersome.

I still obsess about the folks that have blogged about me in not so nice ways.  I still have a habit of every now and again googling my screen name to see if there is anything new.  There is seldom anything new…which is good.  But I sometimes visit the old blogs to see if I still feel that they are “wrong”.  Yes, they are very wrong about me.  But….the ones who don’t want to see that they are wrong….won’t.  The others who know that some of what they have written is wrong, already know it and some friendships have developed. 

The blog that comes up the most often is Medusa’s.  Medusa has no idea who I am, nor does she want too…and that has to be fine with me.  Actually, it is fine with me.  Because of her passion about eating disorders is so intense…she can’t see beyond one act or failure to act on my part.  Guess what….if I had it to do all over again…I’d do it the same way.  And, that’s why I can sleep at night.  It was not my obligation, duty, or moral calling to rescue a 17 year old.  I was trying to save myself at the time.  I was also not the only option at the time….but I sure was held to a higher standard than Medusa even held herself too.  She could have easily have saved the 17 year old if she were that concerned, but it would have cost her her KK membership.  At that time, I wasn’t ready to give my KK membership up.  So…there were options.  I was not the only one.  I responded as honestly as I could and that was that.  Now…if she had other issues with Heidi or Patti….that’s between her and them.  But as far as me…she was wrong.  I know that she was wrong and most everyone else that reads it…will know that she was wrong. 

There are 2 sides to every story……Medusa thinks I’m a drama queen.  I think I’m actually the polar opposite, but I will admit that the KK drama kinda found me and I jumped right in.  Generally, I’m the one trying not to be noticed and in hindsight…I wish it had stayed that way in KK.  But it didn’t and here I am.  There are some people who make news…..I think that would be AmyB and me  (LMBO) and some report it (as they see it) that would be Medusa.  I guess that’s why AmyB and me are drama queens.  And, I guess that Medusa isn’t hired by FoxNews where there is fair and unbiased reporting.  LMBO again.

Well, enough about that.  The way for me to remedy this situation is to stop googling my screen name.  Nothing good has ever come of it.  It brings up a lot of forums to which I belong. I already know which forums I belong too, so it’s really not necessary for me to google my name to find them.

Why does that make this a good day?  Because anytime we grow more towards the positive and finding things that are positive for us …it’s a good day.  (By the way…determining the things that are negative in your life and eliminating them….is a way of working towards the positive.).

Hope that tomorrow is much the same.

I’m back and I have no idea what I’m doing…other than doing something that I enjoy….and seems to help me on this journey….WRITING.

Not sure what direction this post is going to take, because I just came home from vacation, which while it was very fun….was very emotional for me.  And, I don’t know why.   But I do know that I have to get it out of me and here is where I have to do it. 

First,  Gary has been all over my mind.  I’m worried about him.  I’m not sure what’s up with him.  Not sure if he’s okay.  Not sure of anything about Gary anymore.  But Gary hurt me and hurt me worse than just about any human being on the face of this earth could do.   I wish I could stop caring, but I can’t.  And, I’m worried about him.  But, that’s all I can do…I can’t reach out to him.  I can’t do anything else for or about him.  So I’m left with him in my mind…and all the hurt that he dished out.  He has no idea what he even did…but it really doesn’t matter and isn’t worth hashing over at this time. 

Second….HEIDI….Everyday…I sit and think about Heidi and what she did and how she was able to do it.  Did she get special training.  How on earth did an obese woman who doesn’t appear to have any special “real” talent…how did she do it?  I smile when I think about it.  Why…..because she wants to hurt me….but she can’t.  She is powerless to me.  I took my power back.  Do I think about it?  Sure….it’s intriguing thinking about her and all the dynamics that are created by her actions.  It’s really wild.  I mean it brings out so many dynamics…from those that just shrug her off as a nobody who scammed some folks out of $60 each to others who are OBSESSED with bringing her down.  Those who want to talk about her all the time and others who are content to just get the updated information and go about there day.  Folks who engage in vigilante justice and others who patiently await the outcome.  Some folks have their passive-aggresssive buttons pushed.  Others who are vicious.  Some are compassionate.  And…some who even still suppport her.   But……if you really really really look at her supporters.  They are not supporting her.  They are supporting their right to choose.  Now…before you challenge this statement.  Go out and read what her supporters are writing.  No one ever writes anything in support of Heidi Diaz.  They write that they have the right to chose there WOE.  They write that they have the right to their choice and they try to support their choice…but there is no real support for Heidi Diaz.  She is standing very much alone right now.  Well, alone except for her paid legal attendants.  She is friendless.  She is exactly what she is.  an obese, lonely, woman and she can’t stop the trainwreck.  Well, she can…..but either she can’t swallow her pride and arrogance long enough to stop it…or she is to ignorant to stop it.  I’m not sure which….but I don’t picture her as an ignorant woman.  I’d actually love to chat with her.  Mostly out of amazement.  I’d like to pick up my phone one day and hear a voice on the other end that says…hey Dee…it’s Heidi.  Not sure what I’d say back….but I really think it would be a conversation.  What the heck gave you this idea?  Did it seem like a good idea?  Did you think people would get hurt or were you just scamming without thinking? 

I’ve met people who prefer to just move on with their lives and others who can’t seem to keep away from this story. 

For me…this story is part of my journey.   At this point in time, it’s a bigger part of my story than the LAPBAND, why…..because I learned so much from this experience.  I learned how easy it is to develop a “cult” like mentality.  I learned that eating disorders are real.  I learned that people are “fake nice”…(I’d be talking about Heidi there).  I learned that I am vulnerable and that in order to continue on the weight loss journey, I need to remain vulnerable.  At 350 lbs I had no vulnerabilities, I didn’t let people see enough of me to develop a vulnerable spot.

Finally, those cyber-bullies out there.  They are there.  They can call it whatever they want and justify it anyway they see fit.  It’s what they are.  Guess what.  you can’t ever satisfy a bully and I’m done trying.  From here forward, this is where I will be discussing my journey.  Here and my journal at Livin La Vida Low Carb.  I only need to please me here, no one else.   There is no cyber-blackmail here or at Living La Vida Low carb, nor is there cyber-bullying, stalking, antagonizing, etc. 

Thanks to all the supporters that I have had…you know who you are…you know why you are important to me.  I’m not going to list all of you for the risk of leaving one out.   But….you are very important in my journey and you will never be forgotten.

NOW ON WITH THE SHOW!

What a day to be in the beginning stages of reclaiming your journey.  It’s INDEPENDENCE DAY.  Last year on July 4….I was dependent.  I was dependent on the thoughts of “fixing” a failed relationship.  I was dependent on prescription drugs to make me “feel” better.  I was becoming dependent on KK to “fix” what was ailing me.  I was dependent on cigarettes.  I was dependent on anything that I could latch onto to “fix” my life.  Guess what…..it all failed miserably.  Nothing “fixed” my life at the time.  I was in tears all day every day.  I remember well, that I didn’t care if I lived or died.  I could have cared less about anything. 

Now…a year later, a lot has happened.  A lot has happened.

1)  The relationship is gone.  Does it hurt?  Maybe….sometimes.  But what hurts is the “fantasy” is gone.  The way that I “romantisized” (sp) the on and off again relationship.  The actual relationship.  It was unhealthy.  It was controling.  I let him manipulate me.  I let him take advantage of me.  I lost myself and became someone who was just a puppet.  The way he left was more uncaring and unloving than I have ever been treated….and by someone who claims that they still “care” for me as a friend.  I’m not sure that I need friends like that.  There was no respect.  No dignity.  And…..I appreciate being independent from that now.

2)  I was taking medications for depression, anxiety, etc.  All designed to make me feel better.  Guess what…they made me not feel.  I want to feel.  I don’t want to go through life numb.  Numb is great for the negative feelings…I guess…..but then you miss the euphoria of the good feelings.  The excitement.  The pleasures.  Now, I don’t even take an aspirin for a headache.  My body is designed to “fix” itself for the most part, as long as I am good to it.  Heck….I even got through a bout with walking pneumonia a month or so ago….with no meds.  My body fought it off.  It feels good.  It makes me feel strong and I like it.  I appreciate being independent from those drugs now.

3)  KK–what can I say that I haven’t already said.  I was dependent on logging on to my friends.  I was dependent on the promise of weight loss.  I was dependent on the fantasy that this diet would “fix” everything that was ailing in my life.  And, guess what, there was an ILLUSION that it was fixing everything.  Then….just as if MAGIC….I started getting notice….just as if MAGIC….I started gaining confidence…..just as if MAGIC….I was standing center stage.   It was no MAGIC.  It was Heidi…sitting in the director’s chair…orchestrating things that pulled at my heart strings.  Heart strings that were exposed in my journal.  When I found out the truth….that this thing that was “fixing” my life was FAKE….I was devastated.  Not quite as devastated as my failed relationship….but none the less devastated.  Now…..Now I feel strong.  Now I feel free.  It doesn’t matter where I am…yahoo chat, wordpress, LLVLC….anywhere I am…I am now Dee.  Dee who is strong and gaining confidence.  Dee who knows who she is and doesn’t need her the chord of her heart strings stroked.  She can stroke them herself (Now…calm down my CUJO friends…LOL…I still very much value your opinions, comments, etc…..I’m talking about Heidi…and her mentally manipulative ways of stroking those cords…the FAKE strokes!!!!).   I appreciate being independent from Heidi Diaz and KK…… I appreciate that she as a scam artist and a fraud….may very well lose her independence and I am independent from her scam, her lies, her fraud, her deceit and her manipulations.

4)…ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh…my friend the cigarette……Yes….we have a nearly 2 year love affair after we had separated for 10 years.  Guess what….you are filthy, manipulative, deceitful and fraudulent.  You lie to me…..Good grief…there is a common thread with Heidi Diaz…..Cigarettes….you let me believe that there is something “romantic” about a woman with painted lips and a long Viriginia Slim ultra light hangin between long painted finger nails.  You let me believe that in my social night life….I needed to smoke to have a reason to stand with my friends and hang out.  You let me believe that I needed to smoke at work….a reason to go outside and socialize.  You let me believe that as long as you were in my hand…food would not be.  CIGARETTES…you are such a liar.  All you did was cloud my lungs, make my skin look drawn and sullen and take my money.  That’s it.  And, guess what….I made a decision 2 weeks ago to kick you to the curb.  I have not looked back.  You are gone from my life.  A 2 1/2 pack a day habit…done….gone….kaput.  Guess what my payoff is…..Immediately more oxygen in my lungs…Immediately more money in my pocket, Immediately, I don’t smell like an ashtray.  Immediately, I got more confidence.  So….I am independent from you now.

All in all….I think this makes for a pretty good year of independence.

My words and thoughts about KK, Heidi Diaz, Ducks and followers.   I have a few.  I’m not a leader, I’m not a follower, I’m not a conformist….I generally bounce to my own drum beat and so far in life, it has served me well.  So here goes.  Some wanted to know what I think…..Here’s what I think.

KIMKINKS–I think KK is exactly what many have labeled.  A nutritionally bankrupt eating plan that promotes at the very least poor nutrition and at the very worst….an eating disorder.  That being said, when I just questioned the “poor nutriton” behind the program, I had to ask whether or not there was anymore nutrition in my diet when I was eating everything in sight.  There wasn’t….but I was consuming more fats and nutrients, so while there were problems.  They were a different caliber problem.  Then I had to face KK at it’s worst….and it is an eating disorder waiting to happen.  KK sets the stage.  Heidi directs and produces eating disorders and/or eating disorder traits, that can take ages to erase.  KK is not a reputable low carb program and there is NO PROOF THAT IT IS SUSTAINABLE OVER A LIFETIME…..did you read that.  NO PROOF THAT IT IS SUSTAINABLE and in fact, from what I have seen, there is more ABSOLUTE PROOF THAT IT IS NOT SUSTAINABLE.

HEIDI DIAZ–I have never been at a loss for words.  I can not find the words to adequately describe her.  Any words that I have come up with “pale” as far as my feelings for her are concerned.  I have been priviliedge in life to have never encountered anyone like her.  I have been hurt be people, but when the dust settled I could see their motives, agendas or whatever caused things to go wrong.  I usually found a human being on the other side that didn’t really mean to hurt me…but in some sense, they were trying to protect themselves.  The old bite before bitten rule.  With Heidi…..I have found nothing human.  I have found more inhumane behavior in what I know about her.  (And, it has become clear to me that I have no idea the depth of her mental issues).  Heidi appears to be a smart girl…but she is actually not as smart as she thinks she is.  She is actually quite dense…because once you get to know her manipulations….you can see through a lot of it.  Occasionally, she will come up with something new…for shock value….and we do find it “shocking” until we really consider the source.  It’s shocking only because most of us have never encountered anyone like her before.  Example…what she did to Jimmy Moore a few days ago, it was shocking.  But then….once you think about it and WHO did it, it’s not quite as shocking anymore. 

Heidi—when you read this….AND YOU WILL…..I want you to know that you don’t scare or intimidate me.  (nor should I scare or intimidate you).  I know that you HATE me.  I know that I am on your list of folks to HATE.  Guess what….it’s because you know that I’m right.  You couldn’t get me.  Once I knew that you couldn’t be trusted, I was much stronger than any of your mental manimpulations.  You counted on the fact that I would cave to my insecurities, when you struck those chords….but I was stronger than that.  And…that scares you, because you can normally “manipulate” just about any situation.  But…you couldn’t with me.  So you “SUPERBANNED” me.  But…now…you really don’t know where I am…do you?  You don’t know if I’m in or out of KK site.  You don’t know if I can see what is going on or if I can’t see what is going on?  You don’t know who I talk to or what I say…because you can’t follow my chat anymore.  You see what I want you to see.  Things that I post at LLVLC sight or in my blog.  But you can’t see my email or my chat.  I’m not a computer teckie….but let me tell you this.  It don’t take much to get around your SUPERBAN.  The SUPER BAN is intended for one thing and one thing only….more mental manipulation.  It has no purpose in keeping someone out of the KK site…who wants to be in the site. 

Heidi—in a year….how many admins have come and gone.  Your running out of stories to tell.  How many folks have you banned?  The stories are coming out, people are lurking to read them, people are talking about them, and people are watching.  I told you that you were in a bit of a quandry right before you banned me.  Do you ban me knowing that folks are watching…or do you let me stay…knowing that I’m a loose cannon.  Guess what…..you may have chosen wrong.  I have many, many contacts from KK.  I am still in contact with them.  Now they are looking at other blogs, sites, recipes.  They are seeing the success stories and realiaing that your LIES are important.  That your failed diet program does matter.  That the fact that you are still an obese woman who can’t follow the program is important (BTW…that is not a slam on you for being obese….would never slam anyone for that….that is a slam about your lies about your weight loss.  You told me that you exaggerated your weight loss….girl…you haven’t lost a pound.  YOU HAVEN’T LOST ONE POUND….come on……get real.) 

Hey Heidi……I have a leak in my kitchen sink…..Do you know a licensed plumber who can help me with it?  I mean ….a real LICENSED plumber.  Just curious.  …..Heidi….wonder where I’ve been.  Thought so!

Okay…let’s see.  DUCKS and DUCK followers….First, let’s be clear that I am not sure who is by definition a DUCK and who is a follower.  I am “lumping” them…because I really don’t know one from the other at this point.

I think the DUCKS started out with a good purpose and that there was/is a lot of hard work put into their KK work.  I think the DUCKS have done a great job of researching things and uncovering information….very good information about Heidi…her scams…and KK.

HOWEVER,   I also think the DUCKS take themselves way to seriously.  Not that this is not a very serious issue, but many of them almost cross the lines into vigilante justice.  It’s right fighting at all costs.  No matter what the collaterol damage, they bull doze their way through this, not minding who may get hurt in their wake. 

The interesting part….right now….they likely are within “legal” bounds.  However, cyber-bullying laws are evolving and some of the DUCKS may very well get “stewed” should any cyber-bullying laws be passed in the future.  At all costs, many of the ducks will cram there thoughts down another’s throat.  I agree with the position of the DUCKS, just not all the tactics. 

In one state, criminal charges are being considered against a woman, who was a cyber-bully on Myspace to a teenager and the teenager committed suicide.  The DUCKS could very well find themselves in similar hot water.  I know that they have pushed me beyond all reason and rationale.  The have analyzed every word I have ever typed that they could find.  Dee didn’t dot her i…Dee didn’t cross her t.  

It has always….ALWAYS been a situation where I could please some of the people some of the time, but couldn’t please all of the people any of the time.  No matter what I did.  If some liked it…another would come in with a smart ass remark.  It’s a high school cliche at it’s finest. 

They don’t see it that way…but it absolutely is.  And unfortunately, they won’t see it…unless they push someone too far and that someone snaps.  Then they will stand back and “gasp”…what happened to her. 

The emotions of the DUCKS run very very high.  Generally, their target has some high emotion running as well.  But the DUCKS have to believe that theyt are ALWAYS right.  Even if they are wrong.  THEY ARE RIGHT.  The DUCKS are actually another psychological extension of this KK.  It’s a great lesson in human nature.  You can actually see when the DUCKS are getting bored and antsy because there is no new or great news coming out of KK or out of the court case.  I have even witnessed them turn on each other in the FWK thread, (although it is usually quick snips).  Some of the DUCKS and their followers don’t necessarily agree with everything, but they go along.  I have received emails from some that are either DUCKS or FOLLOWERS commending me for “taking the heat”.  This tells me that they can’t even be openly “true” to their feelings for fear of being alienated.  Many will dispute this….but it is absolutely true, or I wouldn’t get emails from individuals who extend a olive branch of support. 

Further, the DUCKS and followers can have an adverse affect on folks looking to leave the KIMPOUND.  It doesn’t take much lurking to see the “attack of the DUCKS’ and most don’t have the stomach to face anything like that.  Now…I have heard the DUCKS (followers) comment that FWK thread is likely not the place to come out too…but it comes up on many KK google searches, etc….so many are led there.  If that’s the first that a potential KK member is drawn to…..the DUCKS are likely loosing them right of the bat.  Some have followed me out and saw what happened at FWK and the blogs and turned tail and run.  DO YOU BLAME THEM?   If you are looking for a change, for people to change…you have a responsibility to provide a “safe haven’ for change….there is not a safe haven at FWK or with the DUCKS. 

Quite frankly, it makes me wonder if there should be two groups….DUCKS and ducklings…..or such.  One to nurture and assist folks trying to leave KK, (ducklings)….thus leaving the DUCKS to continue their plight against Heidi.  Much like domestic violence victims have a “safe haven” while the authorities continue in their investigations of domestic violence. 

We simply have not developed a way for folks to feel a sense of belong and safe.   This is where I see a need in this KK mess.  I see a need for a safe haven of transition from KK to outside the KIMPOUND.  Not transition from the KK diet to something safer….we have forums for that.  A safe haven for the transition from one support forum to another.  Many KK members have trust issues.  Not only from life, but from living their cyberlife inside the KIMPOUND.  Many folks outside KK (especially if they were not deeply involved in KK) think it’s as easy as not logging on and starting to chat somewhere else.  It is not that easy.  Not at all. 

I have no intention of debating my opinions and thoughts about the controversy or the DUCKS.  This is the place where I can journal what I think and feel about it.  I don’t have to explain myself here.  This is based on my experience and that’s all that counts in my blog.  There is no question that I do not support KK and I support Heidi Diaz even less.  However, I also don’t support the vigilante justice of many of the DUCKS.  I also believe that in the not so distant future…..there will be cyber laws….that may be in direct conflict with the DUCKS tatics in cyberspace.  For now….anyone that is in the direct line of fire of the DUCKS wrath is going to have to stand their ground and expect to be the whipping post for a while…or disappear.   I’m not one to disappear….so I stand here….and take my licks.

DEEDLYNN

I NO LONGER SUPPORT THE KIMKINS WEBSITE, DIET FOUNDER NOR THE NUTRTIONALLY BANKRUPT DIET PLAN

Not sure if this should have been a page or a post, but I made it a page……what the heck.  I just hope some of you see it. 

You are still at KK and I understand fully the support that you get there.  I know that support is strong. I know exactly the kind of voids that it fills.  I know how much it can mean to someone who is looking for answers.  Not only answers to weight loss, but answers to other things in life that are topsy turvy. 

But, I want you to know something.  You can not imagine the pain that comes when that “blanket” it ripped off of you.  And it will be.  At some point, you will see Heidi for who she is.  You will see deceit and manipulation beyond anything that you can comprehend.  I doubt that any of you will leave with the firestorm that I did….or should I say get thrown into the firestorm like I did, but I’m here to tell you that regardless of how the KK journey ends for you, it is a grieving, lonely, painful end.   When you really see Heidi for who she is (and HELL, I don’t even know the tip of the iceberg yet), it is devastating…even if you have suspicions…Why, because most of us are average joes that never see anything like this except for on Lifetime TV. 

Guys, it is more than deceptive pictures.  It is more than her not losing weight.  It is more than a diet that is flawed with no maintenance program. 

I’m asking you to stop and listen to your own gut.  Listen hard.  Think about things that kinda made you cringe at first, but you looked away….because it was “working”.  You know…you can’t really post, pm or chat about what you want to because of fear of censorship.  You saw posts….maybe when someone was banned, just to look for it again and it disappeared.  Maybe Heidi is “courting” you to be the next success story…”you are doing so well”, “you look great”, “we have big things planned, so hurry and get to goal so you can be part of it”.  Guys…..its all smoke and mirrors and she is sitting back on her hind quarters and laughing at us.  She is calculating every move and anticipating our reactions to it.

Those of you that are yo-yo’ing  (and you know who you are)….your blaming yourselves.  It’s not you.  It’s a program that is flawed with unrealistic expectations.  Those of you who are beating yourself up “because you don’t want it bad enough”.  Those of you who are mentally exhausted because you just can’t reach the goal that you set for yourself. 

I have been beat up and beaten myself up for 2 months and it stops right here.  I am no longer a whipping post for those who want to challenge my every thought.  I am no longer a whipping post for myself for being so stupid and once again…”not being able to do it” “being a failure”. 

ALL MY KK FRIENDS– you have the luxury of being able to come out of the KIMPOUND with dignity and honor.  No explainations needed, just show up at one of the “friendly” sites and start low carbing.  Healthy low carbing.  Don’t look back. 

Now…here’s the hard part.  This is the part that will challenge you for a little while.  (Much easier if you are banned, but harder mentally).  DO NOT LOG BACK ONTO KK!.  I repeat…DO NOT LOG BACK ON.  Make sure you have your friends contacts, then leave that site and don’t look back.  If you do it that way, my thought is that you will have the control, you can step into a new low carb site, see some old friends and meet some new ones and you can do it on your terms.   NONE OF MY JOURNEY OF THE LAST 2 MONTHS HAVE BEEN ON MY TERMS–that’s all about to change. 

If you see this post….please email the link to your KK friends and spread the word.  Just consider what I am saying.   One way or the other, KK is going down.  It is going to happen.  Whether the authorities pull the plug or KK pulls the plug, it’s going.  If you leave now, on your own terms.  Maybe it will not be nearly as devastating. 

I’ve rambled a bit here, so I just want to bullet point a few thoughts…

1)  Have you ever felt censored in any format of communication at KK?

2)  Have you ever had a “gut” feeling about KK? (Please take off the rose colored glasses of rapid weight loss to answer this question)

3)  Have you struggled with the program? Did you wonder why an extra cup of lettuce was too much? 

4)  Have you really researched Heidi Diaz–or do you just accept that she “used a few fake photos” and exaggerated her weight loss? (Do not fool yourself by acting like this is insignificant) — For the record, I could care less if she lost a pound or gained 50….But, to sell a program that she can’t do–and never did do herself, then berate others for “not wanting it bad enough”.  The only thing she wanted bad enough was our money.

5)  Have you found yourself having thoughts about weight loss that you knew (absolutely without a doubt knew) were unhealthy?

6)  Have you wondered why, over the last year, many who have hit the KK spotlight have been banned?  Do you accept that everyone that was banned, just listened to the “haters”?  Have you heard anything other than they breached the TOS.  (For the record—I did not breach the TOS at KK, I was not offered a refund, and I was SUPER BANNED)

If you there are any of these questions that you can’t answer in a way that fully supports Heidi Diaz and/or the KK plan…you owe it to yourself, your friends and future victims of Heidi, to get out now.  Stop logging on and find a new home.  You are going to save yourself much heartache and possibly someone else.

I’m going to return to my journaling at Livin La Vida Low Carb.  I hope to see each of you there….where we can start a new chapter in our journey.  We can shut out and hopefully shut down HEIDI. 

I leave you with this.  I thought that I had some keys to the “case” against Heidi DIaz.  I have only tidbits to offer.  I thought I had some gems to throw in the mix.  I only had a few stones.  Why, because I had no idea the depths that this mentally disturbed woman had gone and will go.  It’s beyond just a money scam, its a sick and twisted manipulation for seemingly no reason at all. 

The christian in me…will always pray for Heidi’s soul.  The human in me….won’t spit on her if she’s on fire.  I use to be a good person.  She has turned me into someone that I don’t really like very much, because she has caused me so much internal conflict.

DEEDLYNN

It’s time for me to reclaim my journey and that’s what I’m about to do.  Quite frankly, I have been batted back and forth like a tennis ball, trying to be everything to everyone in my effort to do the right thing.  Today, with the help of some friends, I have come to the conclusion that I can’t do it anymore, it’s destroying the progress that I have made…and I’m losing me and the confidence that I was building in the process.

There are some…who no matter what I do….will always find fault.  I’ve been gifted with being a magnet for those type of people my entire life.  I literally attract them or am attracted to them. I’m not sure which.  But they are toxic for me.  They may be fine individuals, but when combined with my low self-esteem and confidence, it is a toxic combination and only leaves me feeling worse and worse about myself.  So, I have to accept that they will never accept me.  That has to be fine.

I am not a blogger, so this will be very new for me.  I read the “help” category about posts vs. pages tonight and maybe I know the difference now.  Not sure, but I’m just going to jump in and start.

The goal for tomorrow…..Not to look back…..AJ you would be so proud of me.  No shame, no blame, no guilt.  Burying it….May it R.I.P.  See AJ….I can still do it.  I still have it in me.  It’s just buried a little deeper.  LOL.  Progress with peace. 

That’s the goal for tomorrow.  To be onplan and not look back.  If I manage that….tomorrow will be a success and when you put a few successful days together, you start building confidence. 

Kimkins Success Story

Age: 43
Start: 348 lbs pre lapbanned

  1) Failed LAPBAND surgery in 2006, which put me $17,000 in debt. (I did lose 75 lbs and have kept off 60).

Kimkins start 288
Current: was 239 lbs now 271

Total: 109 lbs & still losing!

For as long as I can remember, I have been overweight. I have never been “normal” size. I think I was born a size 6x girls. I remember as a kid that the X seemed so significant in separating me from the other kids. You didn’t have a size 2X (remember we’re talking about kids sizes) or a size 8X … but something about the 6X has stuck out in my mind for most of my 43 years.

By middle school I had been taken to my first Weight Watchers meeting. 1/2 cup of cottage cheese … 1/2 cup of tuna w/ celery sticks. Nothing that appealed to a middle schooler. By high school I had alienated myself because of my weight. Others accepted me. I was “okay” with everyone, but didn’t belong to anyone. I would try different things to lose weight, but never could lose more that a couple pounds here or there. I felt worse and worse about myself.

I was very active, skating 3 nights a week, softball every summer since age 5, but all the activity couldn’t keep up with the calories I consumed. And while I was out and about (not holed up in my room), I still alienated myself from close relationships with friends which fostered a distrust in people.

I met a man who seemed to accept me at that weight and by golly I wasn’t letting him go. I married him. It was a bad marriage that only lasted about 5 years. I married him because of a fear that no one else would have me. I married him out of due to my insecurities, but as I matured I realized that it was a mistake. We are still friends, but that’s how it was meant to be, FRIENDS.

Fast forward through years of failed diets … and a failed WLS [weight loss surgery]. I had the LAPBAND. Kept it for several months, but in December of 2006 it had to be removed. Let me tell you, I was low as I was at anytime in my life because of my failed weight loss attempts. When that band was removed, I was absolutely devastated. I went into surgery just to have it adjusted. I woke up to a nurse making a comment on the phone that let me know it was gone. I grieved. I cried. No one understood. Some were thankful that I was alive. I couldn’t be thankful for anything. I couldn’t even make WLS work for me. Why would nothing work? I went into a depression that was like nothing I had ever experienced before. I didn’t care about anything.

Fast forward to June 2007 and the Women’s World article. I read about a plan that mirrored what I was told to eat after the LAPBAND. BUT WITHOUT THE NUTRITIONAL FOLLOW UP I WAS GIVEN EATING THAT WAY AFTER MY LAP BAND PROCEDURE I read and reread that article. I thought about how I had eaten for the few months that I had the band. I wondered how I could eat the same portions (actually larger portions) on my own, because the LAPBAND forced those choices on me. If you overate with the band, there were consequences … you couldn’t do it.

As I read that article there was a little (I mean “a little”) glimmer of hope. I read it again … maybe a spark of hope. I looked at what I could eat. Foods that I actually liked but seldom chose.

I logged onto the website and looked at the areas that were open to non-subscribers. The spark could be snuffed out with anything at that point, starting with the $60 membership fee. I looked at that and thought, “Dee, how many $$$s are you going to spend? You’ve paid a gazillion dollars already on programs, books, exercise equipment and gym memberships. This is just another $60.” Spark extinguished.

I didn’t sign up the first night I logged on. But I returned. Somehow that spark was smoldering.

“Come on Dee, you spent $17,000 just a year prior for the band … what the heck is $60 more at this point?” I signed up. As I read the threads, the forums, the stories, the spark grew … it was a flame. I started the program. It was half-hearted at first. The Negative Nelly in me just couldn’t believe that it would work.

From June to late September or early October, I half-heartedly did it i WAS DIETING AND  WORKING OUT AT A GYM and lost quite a bit of weight. In October, I thought, “Good grief, this is working! Imagine what it would do if you applied yourself? At that point, I walked into the [Kimkins] Chat Room. Then, that flame went straight to spontaneous combustion AND A FULL BLOW EATING DISORDER WAS DEVELOPING and I haven’t looked back since.

Sure, I have struggled along the way, I wouldn’t have expected it any other way. But when I really started participating, the energy from all the supporters CHATTERS, combined with a VERY LOW CALORIE DIET plan that works  WORKED for me when everything else failed, has “caused” me to lose 108.5 lbs so far. TO DEVELOPE AN EATING DISORDER AS I STARVED THE WEIGHT OFF

I’m still a work in progress, but I think my avatar says it all. On the right side there is a sad, lonely, old woman. Someone who is trying to live life, but … just can’t. On the left side, a work in progress — smiling, taking pride in herself and proud to be a part of a eating plan and community of support that is like no other. BECAUSE IT IS FULL OF FAKE ACCOUNTS BEING OPERATED BY THE OWNER TO DECIEVE THE MEMBERS INTO THINKING THERE ARE MORE FOLK WHO DON’T HAVE MEDICAL ISSUES CAUSED BY THE DIET OR ARE SUCCESSFULLY LOSING WEIGHT THERE AND BEING RUN BY A MORBIDLY OBESE WOMAN TELLING FOLK TO EAT VERY LOW CALS WHILE ENJOYING SUGAR COOKIES HERSELF AND NOT SHEDDING ANY WEIGHT DISPITE SUPPOSEDLY BEING ON THIS DIET AND RUNNING THIS COMMUNITY FOR YEARS  I’m living life now and I LIKE IT!

Looking forward to taking the next 60 pounds off with everyone here at kimkins Okay, maybe 70 … I don’t know.   ANYONE WANTING TO DISCUSS KIMMER AND/OR KIMKINS CAN FIND ME ON LOW CARB FRIENDS  or in my journal at Jimmy’s  Remember, I have never been “normal size”.

Dee

Chiistin–I owe you an apology…I dont’ think that I personally attacked your name, but I attacked the litigants in the lawsuit, misjudging the intentions….I am sorry.

Deni–Same reason as Christin and I am sorry.

Other Litigants–Ditto and I am sorry.

John Tiedt–let me say that I was probably the hardest on you.  LIkely because of my profession.  Talk to you on the phone I heard a very caring person.  Not the cold callous plaintiff attorney that I expected to hear, but a very caring person. It is clear….it’s not about money.  I am sorry that I mis-judge you.

AmyB–I am sorry that I lied to you.  As early as that lie…I knew that I would be leaving the KK site, but I wanted it to be on my terms.  I didn’t want to be banned.  I wanted to leave and try to figure out how to make some kind of impact…my style.  I didn’t want to join the forces that …well, handle things different from me.  I understand better now, but some of the things…just aren’t my style.  But.. I am sorry that I lied to you.

ALL MY KK FRIENDS–EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU, THE ONES THAT I HAVE DISAGREED WITH, THE ONES THAT HAVE SUPPORTED ME, MY CLOSE FRIENDS…all of you.

Through your private emails, please get this blog link posted. 

I no longer support the Kimkins.con site, diet creator, nor dangerous weight loss plan

 1)..I am not going to encourage or discourage whatever your WOE is.  I’m still seeking that answer for myself.  But..I want to seek the right answer for me.  Maybe it is what I have been doing. Maybe it’s not.  But I know there are alternatives out there that work and just check out the FOOD PORN on Cleo’s Blog that I have been referring too.

2)  Come out and see the other sites.  See the FREE sites.  Take a look around.  There is so much more support out here.  And guess what, it’s open, it’s obvious, it’s shared, links to other sites, threads, blogs, etc are shared. 

3)  Out here you can speak freely.  No need to worry that a PM is going to be monitored and used against you and we have all done it at KK, we have exchanged phone numbers and private emails, we have moved chats from chat to yahoo IM, because we were afraid that admin would take offense to something we were saying or asking.  It’s not like that out here.

4)  Don’t come out with guns a blazing for KK WOE.  I don’t mean hide, but don’t feel like you have to defend or debate your choice.  It’s your choice.  Just look for solutions to your issues.  Look for friends.  There are some old friends out here, new friends out here and friends never met.  I did get “thrown” out here with guns a blazing on both sides.  I venture to say, many would not have had the “testicular fortitude” (thanks xxxx-my friend at KK) to stand their ground and stay.  I had to do it that way.  You don’t, just come out.  Come out and see what’s out here.  You might be surprised.

5)  The stance I’m taking is about DEE.  It’s not about KK vs. anti-KK.  Quite frankly, I might make my own diet….Dee-Zone or something like that.  (LOL).  I am not judging KK WOE, my friends at KK, nothing like that.  I am passing on participating any further in Heidi’s manipulation. And, my friends…it is manipulation. I take an oath as a CPCU designee to uphold ethics.  My own professionalism and ethics were questioned.  Let there be no doubt where I fall when it comes to integrity.  Not questioning anyone who decides to stay at KK and their integrity.  I just know what I had to do for DEE.

6)  I am your friend.  You know how to contact me.  All my information is out there.  If someone doesn’t have it and wants it…pass it on. It remains yet to be seen if I will be banned.  But if I am…..just google DEEDLYNN….you can find me.  Others have.

7)  I hope everyone understands….or even if you don’t understand, you respect my decision.  It’s nothing personal between me and anyone else.  I take it very personal with Heidi.

Hope I said everything I needed to say, because this was done quick.  My timing was off on this one, but I hope the same thing gets accomplished.

AmyB–My hopes were to present you with a bouquet, not a flower.  Not sure that will happen, but the message is out there. 

I no longer support the Kimkins.con site, diet creator, nor dangerous weight loss plan

WOW, there really are 2 sides to every story.  But there are multiple perspectives.  There are as many perspectives to a story as there are folks that have been touched by the story.  Everyone’s perspective has their own “tweak” to one side or the other.  It’s called their version of the story…..I’m so glad that I have now heard many versions of this story. 

For me, the controversy was never about WOE, in that aspect, I lost weight, I’m still healthy and the program worked.  I’m not here to debate this one way or the other.  It’s a personal decision.  I suggest that everyone make their OWN decision.  I do believe that others have experienced health problems, but I have not.

For me, the controversy was never about a fake photograph or multiple fake photographs.  I have been lied to by multitudes in the diet and weight loss community my entire life.  I guess I’m desensitized to it.  Advertisers lie sometimes, in my opinion, more often than not.

For me, the controversy was never about paying $60 for a subscription to a website.  I paid for a food plan…I got it….I paid for a website….I got it…..I paid for support….I got it….. But admittedly, I didn’t expect much, because I didn’t expect to look like the Russian bride in the picture when it was all said and done….even when I lost the weight.   Remember, I’m desensitized.

So, why am I here now…..didn’t I get everything I paid for?  Yes, I did, I actually got more than what I paid for….I got an education.  This smalltown girl from HICKTOWN, OH….got a big ‘ole life lesson. 

HEIDI;

I reached out to you to offer support when I felt like folks just wouldn’t let this lie, (let it R.I.P.).  I didn’t understand.  I walked out into cyber-space and was appalled at what I saw.  What appeared to be mean, nasty, hateful, hurtful…. and guess what….as hurtful as that was…..It was nothing compared to the shock that I had when I found out about you.  You didn’t hurt me Kimmer.  That would give you entirely too much power, which is one of the things that I believe you thrive on.  Hurt, is not what you did to me.  You shocked me.  Absolutely shocked me.  The twisted and demented things that you do and for seemingly no reason.  You have an internet business.  You have had multiple opportunities to do the right thing, including ending the lawsuit.  Ending the lawsuit is completely and entirely in your hands for the small little price of TELLING THE TRUTH!.  I know its a novel idea….but TELLING THE TRUTH and guaranteeing that you will TELL THE TRUTH from this day forward.  You would prefer to pay the attorneys hundreds of thousands of dollars rather than to TELL THE TRUTH.  So, what more is hiding out there that people don’t know, that you would prefer to shell out money for your defense, when all you have to do is TELL THE TRUTH.  THE TRUTH….must just be earth shattering…if you are willing to pay that kind of money to hide it. 

So Heidi….what have you made me.  Maybe not so much the success story that I gave you credit for.  You made me a liar Heidi.  One of my biggest assets is my honesty.  Why do you think people were drawn to my writing in the posts and personal journal.  Everyone commented on my ability to write and my honesty.  But, here and now, I will tell you…you made me a liar.  I lied.  I lied two times in this controversial mess.  I lied and it bothers me.  It absolutely bothers me.  (well, one of the two lies bothers me.)  Yep, I’m big on honesty, integrity, respect, integrity, personal responsibility, integrity, gratitude, integrity…Did I mention that I am big on INTEGRITY. 

Heidi…I lied to you…….Well, when I said it to you, I meant it. But when I saw the twisted and deceitful mind games that you are capable of playing.  I changed my mind.  Is that a lie, or is that a breach of trust.  Not sure…not sure it matters how you label it.  It’s dishonest and Dee is not a dishonest person.  Enough about Dee. Do you wanna know what I lied about?  I told you that you could trust me.  And you believed it, because you know the mental game.  You’ve read some of Dee’s journal, so you know how I feel about honesty, integrity, personal responsibility, etc.. You just underestimated Dee.  You thought that Dee still had no confidence, no self-esteem and no self-respect.  Did you not read my journal? Or did you just read to the point of figuring out some of my mind, so that you’d know what chords to stroke.  When I said I was building confidence, self-esteem, and self-respect, I wasn’t lying. Those things were being built.  They are strong. 

So, Heidi….here is where your lies started unraveling for me.  A chance link to another’s blog. Curiousity of what might be being said about me.  Confrontation about what was being said about me.  A little cruising on the links in the thread.  A chance encounter with an oopsie roll.  My food addiction, took me to food, good healthy food and an oopsie roll sent me searching for answers….OOPS!!!!  So back I went to read more.  And…more I read. 

Heidi….I was very careful up to one point to just defend my right to respect, my name, and my right to participate in KK.  Then, the blog with the birthday challenge was posted.  I did take offense to that.  I took offense to that for you.  And, guess what…for the first time…I spoke out in defense of Heidi Diaz.  I put my neck out there…like I wasn’t already getting enough heat….to defend you.  Guess what Heidi…I stood out there alone.  I looked around and you were nowhere to be found.  I continued defending you, because for me, not making goals, weight, etc is very personal.  So I stood there ALONE and defended you.  Where were you?  At the point that I said it’s better to say something rather than nothing in one of the blogs, I was sure that you would appear somewhere with information on your progress to your birthday goal.  I didn’t care if you gained weight, lost weight or stayed the same.  Just post something.  NOTHING.  I stood there alone. 

Heidi…I lied…I told you that you could trust me.  I said what you write to me….stays with me.  I LIED!

Here is my original email  & your responses trying to show support to you when I BELIEVED that you were being wronged. 

This last Kimmer post was on 5/8/2008.  I believe the original PM was on 5/1/2008 (unverified)

Kimmer wrote…

They don’t mess with you because you said your piece in a rational, well thought out way. And you basically told them “Go ahead and talk about me, I don’t care.” You took the fun out of it. I suspect they’ll probably try again later, it’s what they do.

But when you’re asking yourself, “Why are they doing this?” … just look at your before/after. That’s why they’re doing it. I’m so proud of your progress. You looking amazing (and “they” hate that!)

K.

PS – Can I use your pics on the front page? It’s OK to say “no”.

>>
>>—————————————-
>>DEEDLYNN wrote:
>>Kimmers,
>>
>> Thanks for sharing. I appreciate it. What you write to me…stays with me. Period end.
>> I am going to start working on the list taht you put in their to help support the site (and the good folks here).
>> Not sure if the girl that emailed me about being “banned” is sincere or not, but I will suggest that she email you and maybe you’ll remember her. She sounded sincere, but there are moles out here. As recently as yesterday someone cut and paste something that xxxx wrote and put it in xxxxx blog. xxxxx PM’d me and I told her basically the same thing you told me. Told her to put her beautiful face back on her pics and just ignore them.
>> Your right…They can “suck the brains right out of your head”. LOL. Funny thing is….they don’t seem to mess with me as much as others. I said my peace and then when they responded, it was only with diversionary tactics–completely missing my point. When I called them on it. The pretty much stopped. But, I’m done going out there. Anything I say falls on deaf ears and there is work for me to do here.
>>
>> Have a good weekend.
>> And, again, Thank You.
>>Dee
>>
>>>>
>>>>—————————————-
>>>>Kimmer wrote:
>>>>Hi Dee,
>>>>
>>>>Thanks for writing. My goodness you’ve got a good head on your shoulders! Their ignorance shows in not understanding that I can’t speak freely at this point. I’ve already said more than I should and I’ve been scolded by my attorneys.
>>>>
>>>>This is what I did wrong:
>>>>
>>>>1) I used model photos to show Kimkins possibilities
>>>>2) I exaggerated my personal weight loss
>>>>
>>>>That’s it. Hand to God, that’s it.
>>>>
>>>>Now the naysayers can gossip and speculate all they want, but that’s all I’ve done “wrong”, and those issues were eliminated from the website. We offered a refund for 6 months, only received a handful of requests and those were paid.
>>>>
>>>>Without going into detail, I can give you some highlights which are in the court transcripts, so I’m not speaking out of school. On the other hand, I’m not going to talk to “them” in any capacity. Please don’t repeat what I’m telling you:
>>>>
>>>>1) It is a civil suit filed by Tiedt in hopes of having a class action suit certified at some point. He had 11 plaintiffs which has dwindled to 7. He needs at least 9.
>>>>
>>>>2) I sent Paypal refunds to all of the plaintiffs back in Nov 2007. 4 accepted them, 7 didn’t. I don’t think Tiedt knows this. The 4 that did, it takes them out of the lawsuit. The 7 who didn’t, it may remove them as well since they refused the refund they’re suing for.
>>>>
>>>>3) Tiedt is looking everywhere desperately trying to find a government agency to take action against KK. He’s contacted every agency and DA in California. So far nothing and it’s been 6+ months. We’ve had 5 AG complaints from the same people (all had already received refunds, 1 refused and actually sent the refund check back to me “registered” which cost her $8!) We reply to the AGs with an explanation of what’s happening, provide proof of refund (or attempted refund) and that’s the end of it.
>>>>
>>>>4) People like Jeannie Baitinger talk about Tiedt “granting immunity” which is so ridiculous. He’s a private attorney, he can’t grant anything if a DA or AG filed an action … and there isn’t one. Then she said I sent computer viruses to her. What? She ran a “cleaner” and it showed like 260 “bugs”. When I run my cleaner it says I have over 1000, but they aren’t viruses. They’re cookies from websites, launch files, popups from websites you visit, etc. She doesn’t understand and wouldn’t listen to me. Jimmy Moore is saying the same thing, that I hacked his site. Me? Who can barely send emails without getting an error message … hacking. Yeah.
>>>>
>>>>5) There was a court hearing last Friday which was a formality because Tiedt & our attorneys had already agreed to place the existing Paypal funds in a trust account pending outcome of the suit and in return we get Paypal access back instead of the payment outfit we’re currently using that charges a higher fee. The naysayers think there’s a lot of $$$ in Paypal, it’s only a few thousand which I had moved back to Paypal in anticipating of having thousands of refund requests (never happened). What “they” don’t know is that there’s very little cash available. I sent $800K to the IRS, $400K to the tech guys (we had a % agreement several months before the magazine), $$$ for attorneys, and $$$ paid to affiliates, staff, Becky Winn (littlebit), Christin, Deni (awakened) plus hosting and operating expenses.
>>>>
>>>>About bannings. I’ll tell you that no one has been banned that doesn’t know why. I won’t go into details or talk about people … but spamming forums with anti-KK trash, telling people KK will kill them, etc. then they will be banned. KK forums are for support and if these people hate KK, then what do they need support forum access for?
>>>>
>>>>Definitions:
>>>>
>>>>Ban – When a member is banned, they still have full access to the entire website except forums/chat/PMs. They can access the diet, options, grocery list, recipe box, “How Emily Does Kimkins”, etc.
>>>>
>>>>Disabled – When a member receives a refund, their account is disabled. They cannot access any of the “log in” areas of the website, but can still see the front page, weight loss tools, blog, etc.
>>>>
>>>>I’m glad you want to help. This is what would help the most to keep the KK site strong:
>>>>
>>>>1) Stay active on the forums, post often and in other people’s Introductions or Personal Journals, too.
>>>>
>>>>2) Let me use your before/after on the front page with your “story” for Success In Progress.
>>>>
>>>>3) Start a positive Kimkins blog (go to http://www.blogger.com), it only takes a minute and I’ll show you how to get it pinged by Technorati (then it goes to Google). You can even transfer your posts from KK to there so you don’t have to rewrite everything each day. A blog is just a diary.
>>>>
>>>>4) Ask your buddies here to start positive blogs too (do it in PM).
>>>>
>>>>5) If you know any clever Kimkins members, ask them to do positive YouTube videos. I don’t know much about that stuff, except that nearly everything on the YouTube about KK is negative.
>>>>
>>>>6) If you belong to any other forums spread the KK word and tell them about your success!
>>>>
>>>>I’m sad about xxxxx. She’s such a nice girl. She ISN’T banned and she knows that. She asked for a new account because Amyb and Christin were harassing her with emails & phone calls. To open the new account we have to close the old account and that’s what we did. Her new account was ready to use and she told people that she’s banned? So I canceled the new account, reactivated her old account and sent her an email. She didn’t answer me and hasn’t been back. She can post at any time … I wish she would. I really like her.
>>>>
>>>>I’ve let some “banned” people back, but sometimes that backfires, too. They want to come back as moles, while pretending to be our friends. If you know any good people who were banned and want back, tell them to email me at webmaster@kimkins.com and we’ll see.
>>>>
>>>>We’ve got plans for when this is over (hurry to goal, you’ll be part of it!) Thanks for the support, Dee. Do your best NOT to read the trash out there … it will suck the brain right out of your head.
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>K.
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>>—————————————-
>>>>>>DEEDLYNN wrote:
>>>>>>Kimmer,
>>>>>> Just a note for you.
>>>>>> I have written Gary and he helped me a bit, but now…I want to write you….not for help….but to give you support.
>>>>>> I have stepped out into cyber-space and dang sure didn’t like what I saw. Told Gary it was like a porthole to hell. And it really bothered me…so I have no idea how you do it. I just got a small gliimpse and this is something that you have been dealing with for a very long time. Too long in my opinion. So kudos for you for holding your head high and continuing in this
>>>>>> Quite frankly, I don’t know how you can trust anyone anymore. But I want you to know that you have a true FRIEND here. A true supporter and I will never turn on you.. I don’t know how you can trust when I say that…but it’s the truth.
>>>>>> I know that you can’t comment on the lawsuit–I work in Litigation..so I get it…even though the “haters” say that your hiding behind–I can’t comment because of the lawsuit. Apparently, they have no idea how that works. I do. But I want to tell you some things–in support of you…
>>>>>> First, I don’t even know whether it’s a pending criminal suit or civil suit. That’s how much I have tried to ignore it. But one things for sure, if it is a criminal suit….the next thing that will follow is a civil suit…because it all boils down to the almighty dollar and blaming someone else for our problems. Funny thing is…they don’t understand that the only people that will get rich….are the attorneys.
>>>>>> Second, the “haters’ spout off that Kimmer admitted in her deposition that she lied and was a fraud. What they don’t understand…is that you get Kudos for telling the truth…no matter how hard it was. I really don’t know what you did one way or the other. I don’t care. It’s not my business. When I paid to become a member of this site….I got exactly what I paid for. I WOE and support. And, I see depo transcripts every day of my life. What they don’t realize is that the majority of folks lie in them (even under oath) to save themselves or to make a buck With me…it’s usually to make a buck because it’s a civil suit. So they out and out lie. Whatever you said…it was apparently the truth and it couldn’t have been easy for you. So…hat’s off to you.
>>>>>> Third, I want you to know that you have support out here. I am behind you 100%. I’m not a mole and have no intention of donig anything from this day forward but concentrating my efforts on making this site successful and the folks on it successful. I’m not going to stray outside heremuch…it’s an ugly naaty world out there. Gary said he sees it as a dose of comedy…I think I still take it pretty personally. You need people in your camp and I’ll tell you what. You can feel free to give my information to your attorney, because I would have no problem being there on your behalf. Not one inkling of a problem with it.
>>>>>> The funny thing is…and I shared this with Gary…..they (the haters)…are only strong in a “gang” type mentality. Because I have had some email me about my post at AmyB’s blog telling me that they were confused, got caught up in it etc. I think she may have even said that she knew that this was the WOE for her and the WOE wasn’t new to her from something called Lean & Green or something. It was LauraLa. She said that she missed the site. I had befriended LauraLa and she knew better she gave into peer pressure and the “gang” mentality. So I have no response to her. She made her bed….she needs to lay in it.
>>>>>> Another emailed me that she got caught up in the initial “banning”, but she had just asked some questions or something. She said she wished that she could get back into the site because she really wanted to do it. She wanted to know what my typical daily eating was. I haven’t responded yet…because I am so naive that I can’t tell the moles from the ones that sincerely want help. But I guess I can respond to that. What do I care…if she is a mole…she can post me menu all over the place…it’s in FITDAY…LOL.
>>>>>> I might never get ti neet you, Gary or Del, but I consider you all friends and I am sorry for what they have put you through and are putting you through.
>>>>>> If you need anything from me…..you just ask. For now…all I can give you is support within this site. I let them derail me for about a milli-second and that was a milli-second to long. Fell off the wagon…but today back on and back on with a vengence (thanks haters..you only made me stronger). And Kimmers, that’s what I hope they are doing for you…..making you stronger.
>>>>>> Thanks!
>>>>>> Dee
>>>>>>
>>>>>>P.S. I do think I have the respect of most everyone on this site. There are two that would disagree…xxxxxxxxx and xxxxxx  because xxxxxx and I had a personal conflict…which I let get the best of me and responded to her…well, not with so much kindness and compassion. I apologized, but well…let’s just say we avoid each other. xxxxxx  felt like she had to put herself in the middle. But other than that…I think the only posts that you would ever see from me on this site are either positive or a reality of my weight loss journey–the good, the bad and the ugly. So I hope that gives you some peace that you are dealing with someone you can trust.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>Have a good rest of your weekend.
>>>>>>Dee